Esr (2005-2007)

[Bluesky]

A little magic.. WOW!!

 

http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c210/hibiku-chan/yui_wu-wan_small.gif

[Spec II]

A little magic.. WOW!!

 

http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c210/hibiku-chan/yui_wu-wan_small.gif

 

Wah.. How did she do that

[Spec II]

why u want to say me?im just an innocent pure virgin sk no.1 handsome boy.......too fast too furious gone in 1 sec.........why u want to bully me......?

 

Sure or not? Heard from kelvin that u went to LSB quite often leh..

[Spec II]

havent spray lar.........is xbox360 theme......xbox theme will be black with xbox logo......i opt for the white xbox360 theme......

 

I can airbrush for ur bike into xbox360 theme.. And is ur helmet goin to spray as well?

 

ESR best friend friend price.. $1000 including ur helmet..

[Bluesky]

A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa.

 

 

"The material we put into our stomach is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

 

 

 

After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said,

 

 

 

"Wedding Cake."

[Bluesky]

This is based on a true story........it's very touching. U have to read... Enjoy...

 

 

A rich businessman had a beautiful daughter,

who fell in love with a guy who was a cleaner.

 

When the girl's father came to know about their love,

he did not like it at all, and so began to protest about it.

 

Now it happened that the two lovers decided to leave

their homes for a happy future. The girl's father started searching for

the two lovers but could not find them.

 

At last, he accepted their love and asked them to come back home in a

local newspaper.

 

Her father said "If you both come back I will allow you to marry the

guy you love, I accept that you loved

each other truly."

 

So in this way, their love won and they returned home.

 

The couple went to town to shop for the wedding dress.

He was dressed in white shirt that day While he was crossing the road

to the other side to get some drinks for his wife, a car came and hit

him and he died on the spot. The girl lost her senses. It was only

after sometimes that she recovered from her shocked. The funeral and

cremation was the very next day because he had died horribly.

 

Two nights later, the girl's mother had a dream in

which she saw an old lady. The old lady asked her mother to wash the

blood stains of the guy from her daughter's dress as soon as possible.

But her mother ignored the dream.

 

The next night her father had the same dream, he also ignored it.

Then when the girl had the same dream the next night, she woke up in

fear and told her mother about the dream. Her mother asked her to wash

the clothes which have blood stains immediately.

 

She washed the stains but some remained. Next night

she again had the same dream she again washed the stains but some still

remained.

 

Next night she again had the same dream and this time the old lady

gave her a last warning to wash the blood stain, or else something

terrible will happen. This time the girl tried her best to wash the

stains, and the clothes nearly tore, but some stains still remained.

 

She was very tired.

 

 

In the late evening the same day while she was alone at home, someone

knocked the door.

 

When she opened the door she saw the

same old lady of her dream standing at her door. She got very scared

and fainted.

 

The old lady woke her up... and gave her a blue

object, which shocked the girl.

 

She asked "What is this...?"

 

The old lady replied...

 

"Try DYNAMO Liquid Soap ... just a dab and it will remove all stubborn

stains!!!" .....

[Bluesky]

GSCE 'O' Levels

Hokkien Exam Paper

 

 

 

Instructions:

 

1. Read the passage carefully

 

2. Grade yourself with the grading system at the end of the passage after reading.

 

3. Not that difficult, chin chai do lah !

 

 

 

Section A: Orrler Exeminetion (60 marks)

 

 

Question:

Singalella why become rich ?

 

 

 

Koo zhar wu chee ay char bor kia, Singalella.

 

She got two sisters, but the stepmarder and the sisters all damn kuai-lan, so she quite zhia-lat oso.

 

Last time Singalella got own maid, but now she become the amah.

 

Everyday must cook lah, clean lah, simi sai mah bao-kah-liao.

 

If her sister say liak kar zhuak, she liak.

 

Tak jit zho kah tau-hin.

 

CPF poon boh.

 

But then, kay piak eh ah-pek got one son call Ah Ming got party.

 

So he say, "oeh, long chong lai ah."

 

Singalella very happy because she never go party before but then her step-marder say, "Lee Mana eh-sai kee, this one bahru lu eh sisters wu standard."

 

Then Singalella must zho sui-sui for her sisters and step-marder.

 

Tap pai how, buay zhia, buay koon and buay pang-sai.

 

That night she only can wave bye bye and then she go back to the kitchen and cook Maggi mee.

 

Her neighbour came over and ask, "Eh, an-zhua lu boh kee party?"

 

So Singaalella kong, "I-wan, lau-bu kong buay-sai, so boh pian."

 

She never expect but the neighbour say, "Aiyah, kee lah, I give you money."

 

So singalella brush teef and zhang-zhui, chen-kor, after that look very different.

 

She quickly run to opposite of the beh-chia-lor, already 11 o'clock.

 

At the party, Ah Ming also quite sian because the char bor all boh sui one.

 

Dance floor even got one ah pek dancing.

 

Just as Ah Ming told himself, "Aiyah see-pay zhia-lat", Singalella came in.

 

Ah Ming straight away lau nuar.

 

"Wah-lau eh, see-pay heng ah, chee kor buay pai."

 

Ah Ming say to Singalella, "eh, sui eh, wah ai kah lee zho flen!"

 

Singalella say ok but Ah Ming like octopus, touch here touch there.

 

But then just it was 12 o'clock, one ah pek die on the dance floor.

 

He become ghost and tell Singalella all the good 4D number.

 

So after that Singalella quickly go and buy 4D, and then tiok tau-pio, zhit-pak ban.

 

So she pay back the kay-piak eh lau-kay-poh and then kah kee cho sen-lee.

 

Simi kuan eh sen-lee wah mana eh zhai.

 

 

 

Section B: Grades - Gauge Your command of Hokkien....

 

A1. Can understand the story and pronounce Hokkien correctly.

 

Hokkien eh sai, bo beh zao.

 

 

A2. Can understand half story and/or cannot pronounce Hokkien properly.

 

zhia lat

 

 

E8. Don't understand story and/or catch no ball.

 

leow leow, mai ka lang kong you is Hokkien Singabolean

 

 

F9. Don't understand rating.

 

kee see lah, wah mana eh zhai lee kong simi?

[ZzGaNgStErzZ]

Section B: Grades - Gauge Your command of Hokkien....

 

A1. Can understand the story and pronounce Hokkien correctly.

 

Hokkien eh sai, bo beh zao. [/size]

 

lik tat, wa eh hokkien buay pai lei. wu standard eh hor.

BTW zha qi ho.

[Bluesky]

lik tat, wa eh hokkien buay pai lei. wu standard eh hor.

BTW zha qi ho.

 

Kns.. ko zha ki ho... ai eh por liao leh..

[draught]

A little magic.. WOW!!

 

http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c210/hibiku-chan/yui_wu-wan_small.gif

 

Ehm... the girl pretty chio, but wat she doing ah?

[ZzGaNgStErzZ]

Kns.. ko zha qi ho... ai eh por liao leh..

 

den zha por ho.

[ZzGaNgStErzZ]

Ehm... the girl pretty chio, but wat she doing ah?

 

from, closed fingers become open palm magik nv see b4 meh?

[Bluesky]

Ehm... the girl pretty chio, but wat she doing ah?

 

performing magic loh.. She turn 3 fingers into 5 fingers! Amazing!!

[Bluesky]

den zha por ho.

 

Zha ki ko ho, eh por ma si ho.. an meh lu keng ho..

 

li ho wo ho tai kei ho!

 

HUAT AH!

[Bluesky]

http://i16.tinypic.com/2ir1buh.jpg

[Angelsown]

The virgin girl is on the phone and asks her boyfriend to come over and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time. Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. He tells the pharmacist it's his first time and the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex. At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all. That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents." The boy goes inside and is taken to the

dining table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend,"I had no idea you were this religious." The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist."

 

I heard before a slightly different version that goes likes this:

 

One day a boy was invited to his girlfriend's house to have dinner with her family and a stayover after that. Excited, the boy quickly made his way to the pharmacy and bought a packet of condom from the pharmacist.

 

He told the pharmacist, "This is my first time staying over at my gf's hse i might just get lucky tonight."

 

He paid for the condom and was just about the step out of the shop when he turned back and asked the pharmacist for another packet of condom.

 

He told the pharmacist, "My gf's mum is a hot mama...maybe tonight i might get lucky with her too."

 

Once again he paid for the condom and was about to step out of the shop when he turned back again and bought yet another packet of condom.

 

He said to the pharmacist, "My gf's younger sister is really developed for her age. Maybe....just maybe..." The boy grinned and walked off after paying.

 

That night, the boy shows up at the gf's house true enough the gf, her mum and her younger sister were all dressed sexily which really turned the boy on and he was glad he had made adequate preparation. The boy couldnt help ogling at all three women while seated at the table.

 

Just then, the girl's father came back and before he noticed the boy he said to his family, "Today a really horny young boy who wants to get lucky with his gf, her mother and her sister came to my shop and bought not 1 but 3 packets of condom!"

 

Everyone was laughing at the father's words when suddenly the girl realizes her bf went really quiet and was bowing his head and saying grace. A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend,"I had no idea you were this religious." The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist!"

[Bluesky]

One day the wife came home early and found her husband in their

bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman. And was

somewhat upset.

 

"You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me --

a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce straight Away!"

 

And the husband replied "Hang on just a minute love, so at

least I can tell you what happened." "Fine, go ahead," she sobbed,

"but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"

 

And the husband began -- "Well, I was getting into the car

to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She

looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and

very dirty.

 

She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

 

Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away.

 

Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they are too tight.

 

I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't use because I don't have good taste.

 

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't use just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't use because Someone at work has a pair the same."

 

The husband took a quick breath and continued - "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, please ... do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use anymore....?

 

[draught]

http://i16.tinypic.com/2ir1buh.jpg

 

Wah lau...very unprofessional for the council to place such notes. goodu, to paste a reply there,thinking its an email? the person who write might not even read. y dun he juz remove the previous note or wipe away the written text since the note is laminated. jia lat man

[draught]

I heard before a slightly different version that goes likes this:

 

One day a boy was invited to his girlfriend's house to have dinner with her family and a stayover after that. Excited, the boy quickly made his way to the pharmacy and bought a packet of condom from the pharmacist.

 

He told the pharmacist, "This is my first time staying over at my gf's hse i might just get lucky tonight."

 

He paid for the condom and was just about the step out of the shop when he turned back and asked the pharmacist for another packet of condom.

 

He told the pharmacist, "My gf's mum is a hot mama...maybe tonight i might get lucky with her too."

 

Once again he paid for the condom and was about to step out of the shop when he turned back again and bought yet another packet of condom.

 

He said to the pharmacist, "My gf's younger sister is really developed for her age. Maybe....just maybe..." The boy grinned and walked off after paying.

 

That night, the boy shows up at the gf's house true enough the gf, her mum and her younger sister were all dressed sexily which really turned the boy on and he was glad he had made adequate preparation. The boy couldnt help ogling at all three women while seated at the table.

 

Just then, the girl's father came back and before he noticed the boy he said to his family, "Today a really horny young boy who wants to get lucky with his gf, her mother and her sister came to my shop and bought not 1 but 3 packets of condom!"

 

Everyone was laughing at the father's words when suddenly the girl realizes her bf went really quiet and was bowing his head and saying grace. A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend,"I had no idea you were this religious." The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist!"

 

Both are very good, despite slight difference

[draught]

GSCE 'O' Levels

Hokkien Exam Paper

 

 

Instructions:

 

1. Read the passage carefully

 

2. Grade yourself with the grading system at the end of the passage after reading.

 

3. Not that difficult, chin chai do lah !

 

 

 

Section A: Orrler Exeminetion (60 marks)

 

 

Question:

Singalella why become rich ?

 

 

 

Koo zhar wu chee ay char bor kia, Singalella.

 

She got two sisters, but the stepmarder and the sisters all damn kuai-lan, so she quite zhia-lat oso.

 

Last time Singalella got own maid, but now she become the amah.

 

Everyday must cook lah, clean lah, simi sai mah bao-kah-liao.

 

If her sister say liak kar zhuak, she liak.

 

Tak jit zho kah tau-hin.

 

CPF poon boh.

 

But then, kay piak eh ah-pek got one son call Ah Ming got party.

 

So he say, "oeh, long chong lai ah."

 

Singalella very happy because she never go party before but then her step-marder say, "Lee Mana eh-sai kee, this one bahru lu eh sisters wu standard."

 

Then Singalella must zho sui-sui for her sisters and step-marder.

 

Tap pai how, buay zhia, buay koon and buay pang-sai.

 

That night she only can wave bye bye and then she go back to the kitchen and cook Maggi mee.

 

Her neighbour came over and ask, "Eh, an-zhua lu boh kee party?"

 

So Singaalella kong, "I-wan, lau-bu kong buay-sai, so boh pian."

 

She never expect but the neighbour say, "Aiyah, kee lah, I give you money."

 

So singalella brush teef and zhang-zhui, chen-kor, after that look very different.

 

She quickly run to opposite of the beh-chia-lor, already 11 o'clock.

 

At the party, Ah Ming also quite sian because the char bor all boh sui one.

 

Dance floor even got one ah pek dancing.

 

Just as Ah Ming told himself, "Aiyah see-pay zhia-lat", Singalella came in.

 

Ah Ming straight away lau nuar.

 

"Wah-lau eh, see-pay heng ah, chee kor buay pai."

 

Ah Ming say to Singalella, "eh, sui eh, wah ai kah lee zho flen!"

 

Singalella say ok but Ah Ming like octopus, touch here touch there.

 

But then just it was 12 o'clock, one ah pek die on the dance floor.

 

He become ghost and tell Singalella all the good 4D number.

 

So after that Singalella quickly go and buy 4D, and then tiok tau-pio, zhit-pak ban.

 

So she pay back the kay-piak eh lau-kay-poh and then kah kee cho sen-lee.

 

Simi kuan eh sen-lee wah mana eh zhai.

 

 

 

Section B: Grades - Gauge Your command of Hokkien....

 

A1. Can understand the story and pronounce Hokkien correctly.

 

Hokkien eh sai, bo beh zao.

 

 

A2. Can understand half story and/or cannot pronounce Hokkien properly.

 

zhia lat

 

 

E8. Don't understand story and/or catch no ball.

 

leow leow, mai ka lang kong you is Hokkien Singabolean

 

 

F9. Don't understand rating.

 

kee see lah, wah mana eh zhai lee kong simi?

 

Took abit of time to understand & get the hang of the language

[Angelsown]

One day a guy with low IQ was out for a walk. He approached a tree and saw something brown on the ground just underneath the tree.

 

"Is that a piece of ****?", he thought aloud. To confirm his doubt, he went up to have a closer look. Indeed it looks like a piece of **** but he wasnt too sure whether it IS really a piece of ****. So he gave a sniff and ewwww it was real smelly...but still he wasnt 100% confirm so he gave it a little poke and it felt really warm and moist on his finger. The guy decided he need to really made sure it is a piece of **** and holding his breath he took a small piece and tasted it.

 

After tasting it, his whole body relaxed and he said to himself, "Ahhh...it is indeed a piece of ****...lucky i didnt step on it."

 

With that he happily avoid the piece of **** and continued with his walk.

[Angelsown]

Took abit of time to understand & get the hang of the language

 

haha really meh?tot you and norman sometimes speak to each other in Hokkien like quite power kind leh haha

[clair]

haha really meh?tot you and norman sometimes speak to each other in Hokkien like quite power kind leh haha

 

Haha... Read and speak different la..

 

I can understand but not speak

 

Heeehheee..

[Angelsown]

Haha... Read and speak different la..

 

I can understand but not speak

 

Heeehheee..

 

i tink the most basic level is can understand but cannot speak fluently like most of us here...but if he can speak fluently with norman i tink most probably he can understand as well haha

 

btw your "colourful hokkien vocab" also quite power leh hehe dun humble lah

[clair]

i tink the most basic level is can understand but cannot speak fluently like most of us here...but if he can speak fluently with norman i tink most probably he can understand as well haha

 

btw your "colourful hokkien vocab" also quite power leh hehe dun humble lah

 

Huh??!!??!

 

I only noe Techno Cat...