Bike jokes!

[Veil]

Q. How many SBF forum members it take to change a light bulb?

 

A.1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

 

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

 

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

 

6 to argue over whether it’s “lightbulb” or “light bulb” …

 

another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid

 

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is “lamp”

 

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that “lightbulb” is perfectly correct

 

19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a light bulb forum

 

11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use lightbulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum

 

36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, whereto buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

 

5 People to post pics of their own light bulbs

 

15 People to post “I can’t see S$%^!” and their own light bulbs

 

7 to post URL’s where one can see examples of different light bulbs

 

4 to post that the URL’s were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL’s

 

13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add “Me too”

 

5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

 

4 to say “didn’t we go through this already a short time ago?”

 

13 to say “do a search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs”

 

1 to bring politics into the discussion by adding that George W. isn’t the brightest bulb.

 

4 more to get into personal attacks over their political views.

 

1 moderator to lock the light bulb thread.

 

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.

 

Follow the bright Light... Enter the dark Tunnel... Follow the bright Light... Enter the dark Tunnel... Wat a vicious cycle...

 

I tink i've juz attained Enlightenment.

 

Om....

[potong_pasirian]

Singh Biker Jokes!

-----------------------

Amarjeet and Ranjit Singh are at SSDC awaiting enrollment for Class 2B lessons.

Before they can enroll, they had to take a “common sense” test first. Amarjeet went first.

 

Tester: If u are riding behind a lorry and a piece of metal flew off the deck and hit u in the left eye, what would happen?

 

Amarjeet: I’ll be blinded in the left eye, sir.

 

Tester: What if another piece of metal flew off and hit u in the right eye?

 

Amarjeet: I’ll be blinded in both eyes, sir.

 

Amarjeet passed the test.

 

Before a nervous Ranjit went in, Amarjeet told him that it’s an easy test and the answers are “blinded in the left eye” and “blinded in both eyes”.

 

Tester: If u are riding behind a lorry and a piece of razor flew off the deck sliced off your left ear, what would happen?

 

Ranjit: I’ll be blinded in the left eye, sir.

 

Tester: What if another piece of razor flew off and sliced off your right ear?

 

Ranjit: I’ll be blinded in both eyes, sir.

 

The tester was baffled and asked Ranjit to explain his replies.

 

Ranjit: When my left ear gets sliced off, my turban will slide down the left side, covering my left eye. When my right ear gets sliced off, my turban will slide down the right side, covering my right eye. Therefore I’ll be blinded in both eyes!

 

Ranjit passed the test.

 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Amarjeet Singh was riding along Serangoon Road when Ranjit rode up behind him.

 

Ranjit: Duck!

 

Amarjeet ,annoyed that his friend called him a duck, turned back and yelled : Pig!

 

The next day, Amarjeet woke up at Tan Tock Seng Hospital.

 

Amarjeet : How in the world did I end up here?

 

Ranjit: When I yelled “Duck!” yesterday, I meant duck your head, there’s a low-lying tree branch in front of you!

[potong_pasirian]

Singh Biker Jokes (continued) !

 

-----------------------------

 

Q: Which MP do singh bikers go to when appealing for a waiver of their summons?

 

A: Singh Han Tong (Seng Han Tong)

 

 

 

Q: Which road in Singapore does Singh bikers like to have illegal races at?

 

A: Singh Kang (Seng Kang)

 

 

Q: If the American Supercross Team is sponsored by Red Bull, who is the sponsor for our Singaporean Singh team?

 

A: Yeo Hiap Singh (Yeo Hiap Seng)

 

 

To get the following 2 jokes, u need to know how the engines of a Super 4 and Old School Vespa sound like:

 

Q: Why do Singhs like to ride Super 4s?

 

A: Because when u give the bike sharp revs during warm-up, the engine goes: Singh! Singh!

 

Q: Why do Singhs also love Old School Vespas?

 

A: Because at idle, the engine goes: TurbanTurbanTurbanTurbanTurbanTurban….

 

 

 

No offence to Singhs out there! I heard these Singh jokes from my friend!