SingaporeBikes•Malay

[BrokenBones]

Originally posted by razin@Sep 24 2006, 11:17 PM

tahan....buka dengan lamb chop, colesclaw, fries, air bandung merah dan hijau, kurma, keropok...

ni bukan buka puasa. ni buka selera..

 

 

 

 

 

apa agaknya aku nak buat sahur pagi ni. nampak nampak nya burger mac donald lah. itu aje yg ada kat airport skrg.

[Danny29]

Selamat Pagi MR....

 

 

 

 

 

:banana:

[razin]

dah sahur hari kedua....burrrppp....alhamdullilah.....

[sarasta]

Originally posted by razin@Sep 25 2006, 01:36 AM

29 days to go....muah ha ha...

knapa paparazin siang nah dah countdown..

[syafiq]

helooo MR!

 

2nd day puase..aku pon kene demam ni...

 

Jagelah kesihatan ye!

[DaBonz]

These are excuse notes from parents (with their original spelling) collected by schools from all over the country:

1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

2. Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

3. Dear School: Please exscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29,30, 31, 32, and also 33.

4. Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

5. Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

9. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.

10. Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

11. Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) (direathe) the runs. [words in ()'s were crossed out.]

12. Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.

13. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.

14. Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

15. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wears.

16. Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

17. Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.

18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.

19. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

20. Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

21. Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.

22. Please excuse little Jimmy for not being in school yesterday. His father is gone and I could not get him ready because I was in bed with the doctor

[DaBonz]

A woman went to her priest with a problem. "Father, I have two female parrots, and they only know how to say one thing. All they ever say is, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Wanna have some fun?' "

"That's terrible!" exclaimed the priest. "But I think I can help. Bring your two female parrots over to my house, and I will put them with my two male parrots whom I taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase, and your female parrots will learn to praise and worship."

The next day, the woman brought her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots were holding rosary beads and quietly praying in their cage. The woman put her two female parrots in the cage with the male parrots. The females said, "Hi, we're prostitutes. Wanna have some fun?"

One male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed "Put those beads away, our prayers have been answered!"

[DaBonz]

There were three babies in a woman's womb, and they were discussing what they would like to be when they were out in the world and grown up.

The first one said "I wanna be a plumber." The others laughed at this, and asked why he wanted be be a plumber. He replied, "So I can fix the pipes in here, it's kinda leaky."

 

The second one said "I wanna be an electrician." The others thought this was kind of silly too and asked why. The second baby answered, "so I can get some lights in here, its dark!"

 

The third one said, "I wanna be a boxer." The others thought this was hilarious, and laughed for a full five minutes, before asking, "Why in God's name do you want to be a boxer?"

 

He replied, "So," he said proudly, "I can beat the hell out of that bald guy who keeps coming in here and spitting on us.

[DaBonz]

One day Steven Spielberg, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Pierce Brosnan were in a jungle in order to take some shots for a movie. Unfortunately, they were caught by a tribal group. As they were about to be executed they pleaded to the Queen of the Tribe for her mercy. She said, ''Get me something good to eat. If I like it, you will be freed.'' The three stars looked at each other and agreed. They then went into the jungle to look for some food

Spielberg was the first to come back. He came up to the altar and offered grapes. She tasted one and immediately spat it out. She ordered her servants to shove the rest of them up his ass. The servants finished their duty, leaving a screaming Spielberg.

 

Schwarzenegger was the next to arrive with some yummy apples. The same thing happened to him, but cusiously he laughed as the apples were shoved up his ass. Spielberg was shocked. Here he was with grapes up his ass howling in pain, but Schwarzenegger had several apples in his ass and he was still laughing. He asked him ''What the hell are you laughing at?''

 

A laughing Schwarzenegger replied ''Pierce is coming back with a watermelon.'''

[Syahadat]

Originally posted by DaBonz@Sep 25 2006, 01:55 PM

These are excuse notes from parents (with their original spelling) collected by schools from all over the country:

1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

2. Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

3. Dear School: Please exscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29,30, 31, 32, and also 33.

4. Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

5. Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

9. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.

10. Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

11. Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) (direathe) the runs. [words in ()'s were crossed out.]

12. Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.

13. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.

14. Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

15. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size she wears.

16. Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

17. Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.

18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines.

19. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

20. Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

21. Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.

22. Please excuse little Jimmy for not being in school yesterday. His father is gone and I could not get him ready because I was in bed with the doctor

Klau pegi Doctor bleh dapat MC,tapi beratur panjang sangat kot.

Mungkin Miko2 ni Semua gi kedai Seng Seh or kedai Jamu,MC not provided .

Suggestion,kedai2 Sengseh n Jamu Should provide MC or Excuse letter.For better Service. Pending by the Parliment.

 

5hrs to go,Endure huh

[number17]

Selamat Berpuasa MR!

 

Kalau ada outing berbuka Insya Allah I join you pples. Tapi depend on date la...

[Syahadat]

Originally posted by princessfiz@Sep 24 2006, 11:21 PM

ouh TulangPatah, terima kasih...

 

ulang tahun yang ke 19. *cough cough*

 

ah ah.. tadik buka puasa makan kek keju. :bounce:

:huohuo: May Number 19 b Gud Luck 4 u,Minum La Ubat Batok ya jika Batok hAPY HAPY YA,

[AlternativeBiker]

Originally posted by DaBonz@Sep 25 2006, 02:15 PM

A laughing Schwarzenegger replied ''Pierce is coming back with a watermelon.'''

joke nie aku pernah dgr long ago, but instead of watermelon, it was durian

[razin]

ha..ha..ha..oiii kurang pahala oii...terlalu banyak gelak...

[sarasta]

geng gue mau turun Arab st mlm ni.. ada sapa mau join?

[syafiq]

sarasta>> isap sheesha kepe??

 

idong aku tersumbat ar

 

hahaha

[sarasta]

Tuesday..Mlm ni klo mau chill pat Arab st

kol 9pm aaite..

pape... contact me for future details..

[sarasta]

MR sesi Berbuka cum Reunion

http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b189/sarasta/ramadhan.jpg

 

DATE: Friday d 13th, October

TIME: 6:30pm

PLACE: Kaki 5, Cafe` & Gallery

FEES: $20 SGD / pax

 

yg berpuasa dan nak buka bersama...

1. Zully

2. SaRasta

3. Nedomar

4. TLK23+1-0

5. Apek

6. IceChicky~

7.

8.

9.

10.

 

p/s: Your place is only confirm apon fund transfer, closing date will be on the 8th Oct, Thank You~

[TLK24]

Originally posted by sarasta@Sep 25 2006, 11:26 PM

.....dan nak buka bersama...

1. Zully

 

kalau 'buka' zul punya, bole nampak peta nanti....

 

kalau bole panggil si Danny sekali (since bulan ni pun bulan DIA), bole aku 'cui' tu mata dragon waktu bukak-bukak session

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

jangan marah ah kamu sepasang merpati mawas, sesungguhnya kamu sedang berpuasa :lol:

 

cukup bulan nanti aku mintak maaf, ok?

[TLK24]

Originally posted by razin@Sep 25 2006, 04:18 PM

ha..ha..ha..oiii kurang pahala oii...terlalu banyak gelak...

Paparazin, maner menu buka semalam?

[TLK24]

MR sesi Berbuka cum Reunion

 

DATE: Friday d 13th, October

TIME: 6:30pm

PLACE: Kaki 5, Cafe` & Gallery

FEES: $20 SGD / pax

 

yg berpuasa dan nak buka bersama...

1. Zully

2. SaRasta

3. Nedomar

4. TLK24

5. Apek

6. IceChicky~

7.

8.

9.

10.

 

p/s: Your place is only confirm apon fund transfer, closing date will be on the 8th Oct, Thank You~

[DaBonz]

John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal his mother couldn't help noticing how beautiful John's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between John and his roommate and this only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between John and the roommate than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Julie and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Julie came to John and said, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful gravy ladle. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"

John said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure."

So, he sat down and wrote, "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you 'did' take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you 'did not' take a gravy ladle. But, the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."

Several days later, John received a letter from his mother which read: "Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Julie, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Julie. But, the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now.

Love, Mom.

Lesson of the day: Don't lie to your mother.

[DaBonz]

A few months ago, there was an opening with the CIA for an assassin. These highly classified positions are hard to fill, and there's a lot of testing and background checks involved before you can even be considered for the position. After sending some applicants through the background checks, training and testing, they narrowed the possible choices down to two men and a woman, but only one position was available.

 

The day came for the final test to see which peson would get the extremely secretive job. The CIA men administering the test took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow our instructions whatever the circumstances," they explained. "Inside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her." The man looked horrified and said, "You can't be serious! I could never shoot my wife!" "Well," said the CIA man, "you're definitely not the right man for this job then."

 

So they brought the second man to the same door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow instructions no matter what the circumstances," they explained to the second man. "Inside you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her." The second man looked a bit shocked, but nevertheless took the gun and went in the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes; then the door opened. The man came out of the room with tears in his eyes. "I tried to shoot her; I just couldn't pull the trigger and shoot my wife. I guess I'm not the right man for the job."

 

"No," the CIA man replied, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."

 

Now they only had the woman left to test. They led her to the same door to the same room and handed her the same gun. "We must be sure that you will follow instructions no matter what the circumstances; this is your final test. Inside you will find your husband sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill him." The woman took the gun and opened the door. Before the door even closed all the way, the CIA men heard the gun start firing, one shot after another for 13 shots. Then all hell broke loose in the room. They heard screaming, rashing, and banging on the walls. This went on for several minutes; then all went quiet.

 

The door opened slowly, and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, "You guys didn't tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. I had to beat the son of a ###### to death with the chair!"

[DaBonz]

Telemarket Repellant

1. If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located, how long it has been in business, how many people work there, how they got into this line of work, if they are married, how many kids they have, etc. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.

2. Say "no" over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each one, and keep a rhythmic tempo, even as they are trying to speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up.

3. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends Plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends, would you be my friend?"

4. If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my cat has the gout..."

5. If the company cleans rugs, respond: "Can you get out blood? Can you get out goat blood? How about human blood?"

6. Ask them to repeat everything they say several times.

7. Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. "Come on, Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your momma?"

8. Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to speak up . . . louder . . . louder . . .

9. When the salesperson asks, "Is this the homeowner?" say, "Is this the salesperson?" And when they say, "Yes," hang up.

10. Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask them if they will give you their home phone number so you can call them back. When the telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me either!" Hang up.

[razin]

Originally posted by TLK24@Sep 26 2006, 08:35 AM

Paparazin, maner menu buka semalam?

Bee hon goreng siam.....dan...bubur daging....teh susu segar...air manis....